Travel, 50+, Belgium

Does this country even exist? - A lot of you might have heard the conspiracy of Belgium not existing. As it warrants a manly giggle towards the preposterous premise, I began to have doubts that there might be something to it, as I explored my photo vault. Where are all the pictures from Kortrijk? Wait, where's Ypres? Where are a bunch of other towns and cities I most certainly remember having visited and eternalized in a photographic form? I rummaged through hard drives, internal and external, to no avail. Maybe Belgium does not exist after all, or perhaps it is vanishing...

Whether Belgium is now being vacuumed by the, jokingly named, Heart of Darkness sometimes referred to as Bruxelles, they are leaving a varied legacy as a sign of once existing. Leopold II, a boy and a girl taking a leak in public, the worst roads in the civilized world, chocolate which could be described as a solid number two (in the world) and beer which is undisputed number one in a bottle. Seriously, German, Czech etc you all lost to Belgium. According to my local sources, they also have a far superior cuisine than their northern neighbors. Especially the waffles. Most importantly, however, they made the Tintin tin possible! (Brits will get this one.) I had the glorious opportunity to experience this Schrödinger's can in the wild, once.

My first visit to Belgium began in weird ways. It's not because I had already crawled through the longest bar in the world, although I was in the right place for that (Leuven). No. It is because of the hotel I had booked. I arrived after a long intercontinental flight, to a place that had all its lights turned off. There was a laundry carriage (or whatever you call it) full of bedclothes blocking the door, but leaving it ajar. It was calling me to step in and investigate, which I promptly did.

I walked around and hollered the hellos and such. No response. I searched every open space and there were simply no people to be found. No lights left on. I rechecked my reservation and, indeed, it was for this place and for this date. I whipped the phone out to make that call and, right then and there, a woman appeared out of nowhere. She seemed shocked to find someone in the entrance area and proceeded to ask: "How did you get in here?" To which I replied, nonchalantly: "I walked in. The door is open." She released a high-pitched squeak and complained: "It's not supposed to be open!" and only then she realized to ask what am I actually doing in there. I explained. She said she cannot help me check in because she does not actually work there, she's just visiting her relatives. The woman did hold a solution to the problem, however. She went somewhere in the back to knock on one of the locked doors and moments later, I was being explained with a straight face that the people in there thought the place is closed on Sundays. It was their place!

My second coming was odd as well as the first one. For different reasons. There had just been a terrorist attack and the streets were filled with fences, cement obstacles and men with machine guns. On the upside, Brussels was very empty. Our small entourage got the whole city to ourselves, more or less. How often do you get to experience this? Well... In my case, two times so far. Jamais deux sans trois, I guess.

While, especially, Brussels was notably eerie and ominous, even compared to Noisy Castle which I was lucky enough to witness before it's demolition (it was straight out of a horror movie), I have actually enjoyed most of Belgium. Okay, Charleroi was pretty horrible and the streets were more hole than asphalt/bitumen for the most part. But the rest of it. We had a little group drive through the smaller towns and a slice of nature, which was nice. I quite liked the locations mentioned in the beginning of this post. Or did I? Was it all a figment of my imagination?

The judgment:
Belgium is leaning on the expensive side without quite going all the way there. There are areas where you are evidently not welcome. A lot of places close painfully early and the place is most definitely not for everyone. In fact, any of the people I have been there with moan audibly, if I mention "how about we go through Belgium on this trip?" Still, there are places that are worth going. There are places that feel comfortable, look great and make you want to consider going "one more time". If you're interested in comic art, architecture, politics, war and the ramifications, beer or just the movie In Bruges, you should consider going at least once. The standing claim is, also, that you will find the world's longest navigable underground river in Belgium. For me, Belgium gives great vibes of -punk (think of eg steampunk, cyberpunk) and gives plenty of inspiration for artistic works with a dark edge to it.

Would I go again? There are still a couple of places I want to see. The probability of another visit is high like a tourist in the Netherlands.