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Languages That Don't Exist

Can you guess these non-existent languages? (Basically the top twenty countries by population without a language that matches the countries' name).
Number of "speakers" given. Using JetPunk estimates as of 16-1-24.
Dialects are not considered independent languages, and therefore are on the list.
See comments for full caveats - please remember, no matter what I do, not everyone will be happy.
Quiz by Fianchetto
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Last updated: January 17, 2024
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First submittedFebruary 9, 2023
Times taken3,102
Average score70.0%
Rating3.66
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"Speakers"
Answer
1.4 Billion
Indian
1.4 Billion
Chinese
344 Million
American
243 Million
Pakistani
226 Million
Nigerian
217 Million
Brazilian
129 Million
Mexican
128 Million
Ethiopian
114 Million
Egyptian
69 Million
Tanzanian
"Speakers"
Answer
68 Million
British
61 Million
South African
56 Million
Kenyan
52 Million
Colombian
52 Million
South Korean
49 Million
Sudanese
46 Million
Iraqi
46 Million
Algerian
46 Million
Argentine
39 Million
Canadian
40 Comments
+1
Level 75
Jan 17, 2024
The methodology I used for this was:

Step 1: Find demonyms for ~ top 40 countries

Step 2: Search those on Wikipedia - disambiguation page if there is one

Step 3: If the disambiguation page refers to a language that is not a dialect, then it is off the list

I took the top 20 countries that passed the test.

A couple that didn't make it: Burmese is demonym for Myanmar, Afghani refers to Pashto, Bangladeshi refers to Bengali

+1
Level 75
Aug 11, 2024
Thanks whoever spotlighted this!

Again, constructive criticism is welcome.

+10
Level 79
Feb 9, 2023
This is a really fun idea, but it might need some polish. I got all but two, but what you've included seems a bit random. Most of the countries felt fair, but the regions did not. There are quite a few countries that probably could be included. Ethiopian, for instance. My two cents, for what they're worth, says this would be really good and maybe even featurable if you went with the top twenty based on countries and population, or gave continent clues or something. For the record, I guessed Colombian, Peruvian, Chilean, Algerian, Congolese, Nigerian, Indonesian... etc. :)
+2
Level 75
Feb 9, 2023
That's a good idea. Thanks for the feedback! I think I'll do that. I just recently started making quizzes. Do you want me to mention you in the caveat?
+6
Level 75
Feb 9, 2023
I read polish as Polish and wondered "I thought Polish was a language". Was that intended?
+3
Level 79
Feb 9, 2023
No problem. I realized polish could be read Polish afterwards but didn't intend the pun. No need to give me credit, but thanks for the mention. I took the quiz again and I enjoyed it; such a neat premise. :)
+4
Level 56
Feb 9, 2023
You should add French
+3
Level 17
Mar 23, 2023
I agree
+2
Level 61
Feb 27, 2023
Chinese is the group of Chinese languages right?
+4
Level 75
Feb 27, 2023
Yes, it refers to a group of languages. I included it because it doesn't refer to one, but many different languages.
+7
Level 17
Mar 23, 2023
You know what they say, "When you take a picture of a wheat field, it will always turn out grainy."
+3
Level 61
Aug 2, 2023
Bangladeshi?
+2
Level 66
Sep 11, 2023
Could accept "Argentine" for Argentinian?
+2
Level 75
Sep 11, 2023
Yes, definitely.
+3
Level 85
Sep 11, 2023
Great idea and fun quiz. I only guessed British with a second to spare... despite living here!
+9
Level 47
Sep 11, 2023
Why are you including Bangladeshi but not Spanish? Bengali is an official language, and it matches the name of the country? Spanish isn't spelled "Spainish," so if you're going to be pedantic about spelling, at least be consistent. I also think including British goes against the spirit of the quiz since England is a country within a country.
+2
Level 70
Sep 11, 2023
I think you must have got something really wrong.

Where can you see "Spainish"? I can't see it in the quiz.

Bangladeshi is not the same as Bengali at all. Bengali is the official (and predominant) language of Bangladesh, which is a multilingual country. Bangladeshi language, on the other hand, does not exist. Neither does British or any of the others of course. Look at the name of the quiz again. :)

And they can't have added Spanish, because it does exist. :)

+4
Level 75
Sep 11, 2023
No, I understand their point. I didn't know how close Bangladesh was and I was waiting for someone else's opinion. I'll take out Bangladeshi, but as for British, England is not considered a country by Jetpunk, and I did add in type-ins for variations of United Kingdom if anyone were to go that far.
+1
Level 68
Aug 12, 2024
That's a reasonable choice, though I would add a caveat that only sovereign nations/jetpunk recognized nations are chosen
+2
Level 68
Sep 11, 2023
Fun quiz. Interesting that most of the countries with a big population either have some language diversity or use a language coming from another country (colonial history).

IMHO Bengali for Bangladesh is close enough to take it out from this quiz, but I can see that this is a tricky case.

+3
Level 66
Sep 11, 2023
Great quiz with a really fun premise! Though you might want to add a caveate that languages that do not exactly match the national demonym don't count, as there is Luganda in Uganda. Just a thought.
+2
Level 75
Sep 11, 2023
Okay, thanks for letting me know.
+4
Level 63
Sep 11, 2023
Really fun quiz! I feel like Kongo should count as a near miss for Congolese though
+1
Level 75
Sep 11, 2023
Too many African languages spelled slightly different.
+1
Level 62
Sep 11, 2023
i took the quiz like an hour ago and congolese was here :skull:
+5
Level 75
Sep 11, 2023
Sorry, they made me change it because Kongo was too close.
+5
Level 79
Sep 11, 2023
I still love this quiz. Interesting to see it evolve!
+2
Level 75
Sep 11, 2023
Thank you!
+1
Level 61
Sep 11, 2023
You could argue Philippines should be on here, since I think Filipino is a type of Tagalog.

The second caveat would be better in the description. You can do new lines in the description by writing < br > without the spaces.

+2
Level 86
Sep 11, 2023
Modified Wittgenstein: "Of languages that do not exist, thereof must one be silent."
+1
Level 61
Jan 17, 2024
what about African? and others
+1
Level 75
Jan 17, 2024
Originally the quiz idea had something like that but then it was just random regions that I picked. Dimby suggested I do some sort of top 20 countries or something so I did that.
+2
Level 22
Apr 8, 2024
Congrats on reaching top 4,000 quizmakers, Fianchetto!
+2
Level 75
Apr 8, 2024
Whoa I didn’t even realize that, thanks!
+2
Level 61
May 6, 2024
Congrats!
+2
Level 61
May 6, 2024
imagine being the dimunitive of the italian word for flank cant relate cannot relate
+1
Level 48
Aug 12, 2024
Very interesting quiz
+1
Level 72
Aug 21, 2024
Should Afghan be on here? Greater population than Canada and it isn't a language
+1
Level 75
Aug 21, 2024
"Afghani may refer to:

Pashto language"

+1
Level 48
Nov 12, 2024
I would argue that South Korean shouldn't be on here when Korean is a language. It's far too similar and it is clearly named after the country (it and North Korea).

Also I feel South African probably shouldn't be here with Afrikaans.