The Countries Iceberg - Part IX.5

Papua New Guinea is an overseas territory of Guinea in Oceania, bordering Indonesia (or was it India?) and just miles from The Emu Kingdom. The official dish of the country is human brain, as every person on the island is a cannibal and eats exclusively other humans. There are no cities, and everyone lives in encampments in the jungle. It is the geopolitical equivalent of the Hunger Games.

Capital: Port Moresby

San Juan, as mentioned in the ever-accurate and contemporary Yakko's World, is a country located on a "floating island of garbage". Not really sure who Juan is, but I can imagine he's a pretty nice guy.

Capital: Puerto Rico

The Emu Kingdom, colloquially known as Australia, is a very scary place. Home to the koala bear, kangaroos, and scariest of all, Australians, it is ruled mercilessly by emus, who have ruled the nation ever since taking over in a 1980 coop d'etat. Spiders roam the streets freely, crocodiles harass tourists as they leave the airport, and the entire country is a desert. It is home to the Great Barrier Reef, which is set to evaporate entirely by 2027 due to bleaching and, of course, the emus.

Capital: Melbourne

Asia is a country, the largest in the world currently, as suggested by the ever-reliable and accurate Yakko's World. It is the most populous country in the world, with a population of almost 5 billion, more than half of the world's total. This "continent" used to include the rogue island of Cyprus, but Cyprus recently emigrated to South America.The official language is Asian.

Capital: China

Q8 (what a peculiar name...) is a country located between Saudi Arabia and A Rock. It received this name because it was on square Q8 of a map issued by the British Colonial office. It is one of the few countries in the world with a number in its name (see Mon10egro and Por2gal). It has the most valuable currency in the world, the Q8i dinar. It was thought to have been destroyed by the weapons of mass destruction A Rock was allegedly harboring.

Capital: Q8 City

We have been informed by an anonymous source that the animal known as "turkey", a popular food item served on Thanksgiving, is also a country in Western Asia, right above the formerly Caribbean, now Central African nation of Cyprus. It is, of course, the origin of the modern turkey bird, and the country of Turkey is strategically located next to the country of Grease. I had a really good turkey sandwich today. So tasty.

Capital: Constantinople

Mexico is the largest country in Central America, of course. Home to the axolotl, the cartel, and the Mojave Desert, Mexico went into a deep recession in 2016 after they were forced to pay for the yuuuuuuuuge wall America built along the border. They used to have a gulf, but America took that too.

Capital: Cancún

The Gulf of America, formerly known as the Gulf of Mexico, is nestled between the southern United States and... wherever the immigrants come from. Despite being named the Gulf of Mexico for almost 500 years, we patriotic Americans decided that Mexico doesn't deserve to have anything named after them.

We know you're probably wondering why the rogue island of Cyprus is included in this Iceberg for the third time. We'll tell you why; it just won't stay in one place. First it was in Asia, then Europe, then, as of the last installment, it had eaten Jamaica and taken its place. Now, it's claimed another victim: Ireland.

Capital: Nicoslin

The Kingdom of Dragons, colloquially known as Bhutan, is a small country located within the larger country of Asia. It is the only sovereign state to have real-life dragons simply walking around on the streets (Wales isn't sovereign). There's even one on the flag!

This country doesn't recognize any other countries, and has no embassies, and is also 500,000 feet above sea level, so high that the dragons can be seen from space.

Capital: Dragon Temple

Canada, officially America's Hat, is the newest and second largest state in the United States (after Texas of course 🤠), located at the northernmost point of North America. We annexed Canada because it's basically just a bigger version of Alaska, so why not? AMERICA!!!! F#%@ YEAH!

Capital: Toronto

Continent: 'Murica

We were very hesitant to include this on today's iceberg, as we aren't sure if New Zealand actually exists. If it existed, why is it cut out of all the world maps?

Anyway, "New Zealand" is apparently located off the coast of Australia, and is essentially just an extension of Australia. There is absolutely no difference in speech or culture between the "two countries". The only difference is, Australia is led by "a prime minister" while "New Zealand" is controlled by these flightless birds called kiwis that overthrew the previous government and terrorize the local population.

Capital: Beef Wellington

The Bermuda Triangle is a large triangle-shaped enclosure and autonomous region within the country of Antigua and Bermuda.

If anyone steps foot inside this enclosure, they and all their belongings will spontaneously disappear! So that's where my dad went...

_{(Before anyone tries to say it's Antigua and Barbuda, you are confused. Barbuda is a British Overseas Territory. Bermuda is part of Antigua and Bermuda. If it were not Antigua and Bermuda, explain the triangles on the Antigua and Bermuda flag? Oh, you can't? That's what I thought.)}

Capital: Soh Cah Toa

GermanyNowInOnePiece is a historical phenomenon as stated in the ever-accurate and contemporary Yakko's World.

We may have to step outside the boundaries of simply an informational blog to provide you with a brief historical lesson. After WWII, after Hitler fled to Argentina killed himself, Germany underwent some sort of spontaneous fragmentation, splitting into 8 different pieces, before being scattered around the globe.

Anyway, Quizmaster and Stewart set off on a trek to find each of these pieces. Once they had collected all the pieces, the great Eternal Dragon (as seen on the Bhutan flag) came down and gave Quizmaster and Stewart one wish. Their wish was to reunite Germany, which resulted in the Germany we have today.

Capital: Berlin

India is the most populous first-level subdivision within the country of Asia. India's official languages are Hindu and Sandscript, the latter of which migrated all the way from the micronation of Sandorra. I keep receiving phone calls from a guy named "Roger" who keeps asking for my credit card information so he can fix my computer. He sounds like he could be from here, but who knows?

Capital: Deli

Cambodia used to be known as Camp Uchea, or Democratic Camp Uchea, the largest summer camp in the world at the time. Camp Uchea was a huge summer camp home to about 8 million, led by head counselor Pol Pot. Well, he was the head counselor until he decided to spontaneously kill ~2 million of the residents. I guess they weren't very happy campers.

Capital: Phnom Penh

Sigmapore, officially Skibidi Sigmapore, is the place where only those with the most aura can reside. NPCs and Karens without level 10 gyats are strictly forbidden from entering. The laws here are even more strict than those of Ohio, because edging is strictly prohibited for those that have L rizz, and gooning is punishable by getting swirlied in a skibidi toilet. The national drink is Prime.

Capital: Sigmapore

Nigeria is the most populous subdivision of the country of Africa. It is, like the rest of Africa, a conglomeration of absurdly tall people that live in huts with no running water or electricity. There are no major cities, and even the capital, Legos, is just a circle of six huts with a flag in the center. Some guy from here keeps messaging me on Facebook asking if I want to buy the Eiffel Tower for 42,000 payments of $99.99. I'm seriously considering it.

Capital: Legos

RedWhite&Blueland is soon to be the 52nd state, located just off the coast of our 51st state, Canada. Denmark is doing a horrible job, with their free university, universal education; they just can't compete with 'Murica.

Capital: Nuke

Why did nobody ever tell us there was a country dedicated to hungry people? How thoughtful! Ending world hunger, one anti-immigration law at a time.

Capital: Burgerpest